My Stepbrother's Dirty Little Secret novel Chapter 417

Chapter 417

Gianna

I stayed perfectly still behind the black glass long after the door slammed shut behind Vincenzo.

My heart still would not slow down.

Everything felt too loud.

The blood rushing in my ears. The sound of Adriano and Raphael talking outside. My own breathing trapped inside this tiny dark space. I pressed my hand harder over my mouth because I suddenly felt sick.

I should never have been here.

That thought kept repeating over and over inside my head like something sharp scraping against my skull.

I should never have followed Raphael here tonight, never let this happen, never let it keep happening.

Because now I was standing hidden behind secret walls while men covered in blood talked about executions like they were discussing the weather.

And somehow that was my normal now.

I squeezed my eyes shut hard but I could still hear Vincenzo’s voice.

No woman is special to Raphael.

The words dug deeper now that I was alone.

I hated that they hurt this much.

I hated that part of me immediately tried arguing against them even after everything Raphael himself had said tonight.

I don’t want marriage.

I can’t love anybody.

This works.

Practical.

The words all blended together until my chest started hurting again.

I leaned back against the wall behind me slowly. The cold metal pressed against my spine through Raphael’s shirt.

It still smelled faintly like him and somehow that only made everything worse.

Because that was the problem.

Everything with him felt too good right until the moment it didn’t.

I swallowed hard and looked down at my shaking hands.

What the hell was I even doing anymore?

Sneaking around with my stepbrother in dark forests. Letting him touch me against trees. Hiding behind black glass panels while his brothers talked about murder ten feet away from me.

I sounded insane.

No.

Worse.

I rubbed both hands hard over my face.

I did this to myself.

Raphael never lied to me, not really. He told me exactly who he was from the beginning. I was the idiot who kept searching his actions for meanings his words never gave me.

I thought about the way he remembered things about me.

The food I liked.

The way I hurt myself on corners when I was nervous.

The way he looked at me sometimes when he thought I wasn’t paying attention.

Nobody noticed small things like that unless they cared.

Right?

But then Vincenzo’s voice came crashing back into my head again.

Warm holes with names he forgets five minutes later.

I physically flinched.

Because no matter how cruel the words were, part of me could not stop wondering if maybe Vincenzo knew Raphael better than I ever would.

They grew up together, not me, maybe this was normal for Raphael.

Maybe protecting women meant nothing to him. Maybe remembering details meant nothing. Maybe touching me like I mattered was just another thing men like him learned how to do well. I hated myself for even thinking it but I could not stop.