The Rose He Killed novel Chapter 7

<Chapter 10 Being Myself in the dark

Chapter 10: Building Myself in the dark

Bella POV

+25 Points>

The door closed, leaving me alone in the quiet room. I sat on the thin mattress and let myself feel it-the exhaustion, the fear, the overwhelming impossibility of everything ahead.

Then I pulled out my phone, turned it on just long enough to search for free online courses in business management, and turned it back off. If I was going to survive this, I needed to be smarter. Stronger and better than I’d ever been.

The next three weeks passed in a blur of survival. I found a job cleaning offices at night, the kind of work that paid minimum wage and asked no questions about your past. I’d show up at 10 PM with a cart full of supplies and work until 6 AM, scrubbing toilets and vacuuming floors while the rest of the city slept.

During the day, I studied. Business courses, investment strategies, anything I could access for free online. I took notes in a battered notebook I’d found at a thrift store for fifty cents, filling page after page with formulas and theories and plans.

The other women at the shelter thought I was crazy, studying like I was still in college instead of sleeping during the few hours I had. But I couldn’t stop. If I stopped, I’d think about Caleb. About my parents. About everything I’d lost.

The morning sickness hit hard around week four. I’d be scrubbing a bathroom at 2 AM and suddenly have to sprint to the toilet myself, retching until there was nothing left. My body ached constantly from the physical labor combined with pregnancy, but I couldn’t afford to slow down.

One particularly bad night, I was cleaning the executive floor of an investment firm when the nausea hit so hard I collapsed against the wall, my vision swimming.

“Hey, are you okay?”

I looked up to find a young woman in scrubs staring at me with concern. She had a kind face, warm eyes, and her black hair cut in a practical bob.

“I’m fine.” I tried to stand, but my legs wouldn’t cooperate. “Just tired.”

“You’re pregnant.” It wasn’t a question. She knelt beside me, her hand going to my wrist to check my pulse. “How far along?”

“Couple months.” I closed my eyes. “Please don’t tell anyone. I need this job.”

“I’m not going to tell anyone.” Her voice was gentle. “But you need to see a doctor, have you had any prenatal care?”

I shook my head. She sighed and pulled a card from her pocket. “I’m Dr. Maya. I work at the free clinic down the Street. Come see me tomorrow, okay? I’ll make sure you and the baby are healthy.”

“I can’t afford”

“Free clinic,” she repeated firmly. “That means free, no insurance needed, no questions asked. Just promise me you’ll come.”

1:3

Chapter 10 Biding Myself in the dark

+25 Points

Hooked at the card through blurry eyes, at the address printed in simple black letters. Another lifeline when I desperately needed one. “Okay.” My voice cracked. “Okay, I’ll come.”

True to my word, I showed up at the clinic the next day, exhausted and terrified. Maya took me back to an exam room herself, her presence calm and reassuring.

“Let’s take a look at this baby.” She squeezed gel onto my barely-there bump and pressed the ultrasound wand against my skin.

The room filled with a sound like galloping horses-fast, strong, perfect. “That’s the heartbeat,” Maya said softly. “Strong and healthy. You’re doing good, mama.”

Mama. The word hit me like a punch to my gut. I was going to be someone’s mother. This tiny person growing inside me was real, with a heartbeat and a future that depended entirely on me not giving up.”Can I see?” My voice came out barely a whisper.

Maya turned the screen toward me, and there it was-a tiny blob with a flickering heart, swimming in darkness, completely unaware of how desperately its mother was fighting to survive.

The tears came then, hot and unstoppable. Maya handed me tissues and let me cry, her hand warm on my shoulder.

“You’re not alone,” she said quietly. “I don’t know what brought you here or what you’re running from, but you’re not alone anymore. Okay?”

I nodded, unable to speak past the lump in my throat.

“What’s the baby’s name?” she asked. “Or have you thought about it yet?”

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