TEMPORARY MATES PERMANENT CRAVINGS novel Chapter 365

Three hundred and sixty-five

Isabella POV

I couldn’t stop crying.

All the tears I had carried since the beginning had finally found a way to become real. I had been afraid Wesley would look at the bond and see another burden he had been forced to carry. I had been afraid that once he learned the truth, he would decide loving me was too dangerous and that staying away from me was the only way to keep me safe.

He had said it himself. He didn’t want the bond.

Luna Lisa pulled me into her arms, and I buried my face against her shoulder. Anita’s fand settled gently against my back while Emma stood beside us, tears shining in her eyes. “He needs time,” Luna Lisa said softly. “This is too much for him.”

“He needs to accept help,” Grandma Cassidy said. There was more irritation than sympathy in her voice, which surprised me considering how much she adored Wesley. “He has spent years refusing to let anyone help him. Being his mate doesn’t mean you have to carry his pride for him.”

“Cassidy,” Luna Lisa warned.

“I’m not blaming him for being afraid. I’m saying he needs to stop making decisions based on that fear.”

Luna Lisa guided me toward a chair and waited until I sat. I wiped at my cheeks, but more tears slipped free almost immediately. My chest hurt from holding everything inside for so long, and now that I had finally broken down, I didn’t know how to make it

stop.

“Mommy?”

I looked up to find Maverick standing beside me, staring at my face with the worried confusion only a child could manage.

“Why are you crying?”

Oh, goddess.

I reached for him, but Wesley’s grandmother was already moving toward him. She said something that caught his attention, then gently took his hand and led him toward the other side of the room. I watched them go, trying to pull myself together while the ache in my chest only seemed to grow.

I understood Wesley. At least, I understood why he was afraid.

His entire life had taught him that his wolf could hurt the people closest to him. Beatrice had been proof of that fear. He had loved her, and when his condition became too much, she had suffered because of it. Now he had learned that I was his mate, and instead of seeing the bond as something beautiful, he saw another person who could be destroyed by him.

Even through my tears, I couldn’t tell him he was completely wrong.

I was afraid too. I didn’t know what being his mate would demand from me or how much I would have to endure when his wolf turned against him again. I didn’t know whether love would be enough when fear took control of him. But hearing him reject me had still broken something inside me.

Everyone kept telling me he would come around. He needed time. He loved me. He was scared. Things would be different. The words floated around me without settling anywhere. I heard them, but I couldn’t make myself believe them yet.

Eventually, my tears slowed. I wiped my face and stared down at my hands until Grandma Cassidy came to sit beside me. She took one of them and squeezed it gently.

“Don’t reach out to him. Not until he comes to you himself.”

My throat tightened. “What if he doesn’t?”

+15 Bonus

She gave me a small smile. “What if he does? There is nothing more powerful than love, Isabella, especially when that love is bound by a fnate bond. It may seem impossible right now, but some things are stronger than fear.”

I wanted to believe her. Twanted to believe that whatever had brought Wesley and me together could also bring him back to me.

“I should return to the lodge.”

“You could come home with us,” Emma offered. A change of scenery night help. You don’t have to be alone tonight.”

I appreciated the offer, but the thought of going anywhere else exhausted me. “Thank you, but I’ll be fine.”

I stood and wiped the last of the tears from my face. The reason I refused Anita and Emma’s offer had little to do with wanting to be alone. A part of me still hoped Wesley would come looking for me.

Maybe he only needed time to calm down. Maybe, after he had thought everything through, he would return and ask me to explain. I kept imagining the conversation we might have and how I would make him understand that I had never meant to hurt him. It was probably foolish to build an entire conversation with someone who wasn’t even there, but hope had never been particularly interested in practicality.

“If you need anything, Isabella, anything at all, tell me,” Alpha Cameron said. “You don’t have to stay at the lodge. You can move into the house. You’re part of this family now, and we want to make sure you’re taken care of.”

The kindness in his voice made my throat tighten again.

“Thank you, Alpha. I’m fine at the lodge.”

Nobody argued with me. Perhaps they understood that forcing me to stay would only make everything harder, and I was grateful they let me make that choice for myself.

Maverick and I returned to the lodge. Thankfully, Iris and Harrison were nowhere around, which saved me from having to explain what had happened. I wasn’t sure I could have managed another conversation about Wesley without starting to cry again.

Maverick had spent most of the evening playing, so I bathed him, dressed him, and tucked him into bed. His eyes were already closing before his head touched the pillow, and within minutes his breathing had settled into the slow rhythm of sleep.

The room became quiet, and there was nothing left to occupy my hands.

My phone lay beside me. I picked it up and checked the screen.

No missed calls. No messages from Wesley.

I sighed and lay back on the bed, staring at the ceiling for a moment before turning my head toward the window. Moonlight spilled across the floor, silvering the edge of the bed.

If Wesley was determined to destroy himself, there was little I could do to stop him. If he asked for the bond to be broken, all I could do was beg him not to. If begging failed, I would have to let him go.

The thought hurt so badly that I pressed a hand against my chest as though I could physically hold the pain in place.

Eventually, exhaustion dragged me into sleep, but it offered no real rest. My dreams were filled with darkness and things I couldn’t escape.

I was running. Sometimes I had two legs. Sometimes four. Large beasts surrounded me, their bodies closing in whenever I tried to escape, their eyes following me through the darkness. Somewhere beneath the ground, Maverick was trapped behind a heavy door, and I could hear him calling for me.

I tried to reach him, but the beasts kept closing in. I fought my way through them, desperate to get to him, but every path disappeared beneath their bodies. His voice grew louder, and just as I reached for the door, everything went black.

I woke with a gasp, my chest heaving as I pushed myself upright.

+15 Bonus

Maverick slept soundly beside me, completely unaware of the nightmare that had just torn me awake. I stared at him for a moment and slowly let out the breath I was holding. With everything that had happened, my mind was probably taking every fear I had and turning it into something monstrous.

Sleep refused to return.

I turned on the television and lowered the volume until the screen became nothing more than moving light across the roum. Whatever was playing failed to hold my attention. My thoughts kept returning to the same questions. Had Wesley managed to sleep? Was he still angry? Would he forgive me in the morning?

The questions circled until my phone suddenly pinged.

I nearly dropped it.

The message was from Emma.

I know you’re probably asleep, but I haven’t been able to sleep. I keep wishing there was something I could do to make Wesley understand.

I sat up properly and typed back.

I’m awake.

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